I’m at uni, and I currently have a group assignment with 7 others. One of them, a man in his twenties, keeps messaging me for help with his assignments in other units (we’re in all of the same classes). The first time he just screenshotted and asked if it looked okay, and I said yeah it looked fine, but now I seemed to have open the floodgates by responding at all. He has been messaging me constantly, asking me what to do, how to write it, he’s confused. I got 8 messages yesterday. 8!! I did help him a little bit at first, but then he asked if he could call me which, NO. I told him that I couldn’t help him to that degree, I was busy, and that the tutor posted about where to get help on the unit page (which she did.) He STILL messaged me this morning. I haven’t answered and I don’t plan to.
What’s funny is that I am not the only mature aged student in the group- I am, however, the only woman. I do enough emotional labour for my fucking husband, not going to start with some random at uni (sorry @MrT, love you lots 😗) The entitlement from this guy, that I’m going to drop everything and spend hours helping him, a virtual stranger, just floors me.
I’m still getting the guilts though. Ah, that female socialisation to “just be nice.”