I don’t regret my daughter. If I had a chance to go back in time I wouldn’t take it, as I would never want to risk her (totally understand Tony Stark in the last avengers movie now), 5 billion people vs my DD… DD wins everytime 😛
That being said, I can sympathize and feel for people who may regret having children, or even more children. Parenting is certainly not the instragram and day time TV dream I anticipated. Its hard.
I’m a single parent, so I don’t have the additional relationship issues to contend with, but I also don’t have anyone to help. All the support I was promised from friends and family never happened, and an unprecedented pandemic hasn’t helped either. Daycare has been incredibly stressful, they seem to go out of their way to make my life as a parent hard with all their rules and way of handling things. Apart from one overnight hospital stay as a newborn and one night at my parents, she’s mine 24/7 to care for. Its unrelenting. My needs always have to come second. It doesnt matter if Im sick, tired or even in pain I have to take care of her.
As she gets older it continues to get easier in most ways. We can do more interesting things together. And as she gets older it will get better and better, I look forward to taking her away on holidays, going shopping or movies, but a lot of these things are years away. And every stage comes with its positives and negatives. Newborn was so so hard, the lack of sleep was akin to torture.
I think the hardest part is not having support. No one can look after her for even 30mins. I would mow my lawn while carrying her on my hip. She wouldnt be put down. I dont want a partner, but Id have loved some friends willing to watch her for me or help out. Its not so bad now she’s older. Thank gawd for TV.
So no, I don’t regret her, I love her so much. I can honestly say I never understood love till I had her. But it doesn’t stop me being very honest with friends and my sister about parenting, and affirming their decisions not to have children. And once she’s a little older and more self-sufficient I will do a lot more for any of my friends who have kids then was done for me.