I’ve suffered from anxiety all my life but over the last couple of months, its off the charts. I have this feeling in my chest almost constantly. Like I’m about to do something new and terrifying except I’m not, its just everyday life. I was seeing a psychologist for about a year but stopped some time last year. I didn’t feel I was getting anywhere and there were limited opportunities to put myself into situations anyway. Now I just seem to be inundated with them and I can’t work out if its just me or the pressure I’m under. Now its hit a point where I think I need medication but I don’t want to. I’m worried about putting on weight and feeling fuzzy in the head or losing my edge at work. Anyway, just a bit of a vent… I’ve booked an appointment with my GP, unfortunately she’s not available for 3 weeks…

Last year was a doozy and anyone who was teetering, I think it was enough to tip them over the edge. I started lexapro the august before the pandemic hit. I can’t even imagine how I would have survived last year without it. I was really worried about going on medication too, but it’s been good. Not sure if I have side effects, or if it’s covid/aging shit. Eta. Talk to the gp. Different ones have different side effects…

Agree with [unknown] , last year was terrible for everyone’s mental health. I’m so sorry you are feeling anxious, it is a terrible feeling. I find emersing myself in a book, game or movie can help, or talking to someone. If you need a distraction please feel free to PM about anything.

I take a low dose of Lovan for anxiety and depression and I have emergency Valium. Couldn’t be without it now, could be time to talk to your GP? Best wishes ❤️ ETA just saw your GP is booked out - could you asked for the next cancellation spot as its urgent?

Do you know why it’s increased OP, or what is feeding it? Do you spend a lot of time overthinking? I’ve also heard that weird hormonal stuff happens in the 40s as we head for menopause, not sure if you’re in that range. Would you be up for seeing a different psych do you think? Different people have different approaches and it can take some goes to find a good match, it sounds like they were trying exposure? Bummer about the GP, that’s a long wait. Do you have stuff you do that settles it in the short term, exercise or mindfulness or anything?

CallMeAl Do you know why it’s increased OP, or what is feeding it? Do you spend a lot of time overthinking? Its so many things. Theres a lot of scrutiny on my team, we interact with very senior leaders of a large organisation and they can be intimidating, every meeting that involves them is nerve wracking and requires lots of preparation and approvals of content. Theres an entirely separate team that exists just to review and challenge our work, and the politics around that is insane. Meanwhile, I’ve taken on more responsibilities, I’m a line manager, which I’ve done before but the high pressure of our work seems to mean theres frequent drama and confrontation in the team with clashes of personalities. I’m having trouble filling some of our vacant roles, in a team that was halved in a restructure, so theres the extra workload and not being able to dedicate the time to filling the vacancies. I have a couple of very junior team members and the irony of being overloaded is its hard putting the time into breaking down work into tasks they can do, so while the more senior members are overloaded, the juniors are underloaded. None of my work hits my expectations of quality because of the circumstances I’m in. I’m also back in the office a couple days a week and I think interacting with people face to face again is adding to things. I keep ruminating over stupid things I’ve said. I keep doing stupid things I wouldn’t normally do because I’m not thinking clearly. Then at home, DH has closed down his business and his business partner has been incredibly challenging. Its akin to a messy divorce. So he has been stressed out and wrapped up in his world, and venting to me and me to him too but neither of us can be much of a support atm. I feel incredibly distant from him atm, more than ever before, and I wonder if our marriage will survive. DD1’s reading and writing is not good, she needs to be assessed for dyslexia but its waiting lists only atm, and I feel I should be doing more to get her better support at the school or get her a diagnosis, but every time I try its another hurdle and I just don’t have the energy I should because of my job and because I keep procrastinating, I think because I can’t handle any more confrontation. DD2’s behaviour at home is just shocking. I don’t know where to begin. She screams, hits, kicks, destroys the house on what seems like a daily basis, she just seems to be spiraling downwards and I can’t figure out if its because we aren’t putting enough energy into our parenting of her or its more than that. I get to weekends and I’m mentally exhausted, I end up spending hours on netflix without any motivation to do much else, so now the house is a disaster. Theres all sorts of random things too, like head lice that the kids keep bringing home and the hours of combing to get rid of them. I keep thinking of more but I really need to stop and go to bed. Not that I’ll be able to sleep.

wannabefree I hope you don’t mind me saying Holy Fuck! That is such a lot. We had the business breakdown, that was hard just on its own! None of my tips are particularly helpful, so just wanted to send sympathy.

That is indeed a lot to be dealing with, realistically too much for any mortal human. No wonder you are anxious. I take Lexapro (for depression) and just wanted to say that SSRI’s don’t make you in any way dopey, so you won’t lose your edge at work. Chances are you will think more clearly, make decisions more easily, and not have to go back over things as much. If it works for you. When i was feeling depressed before going back on the Lexapro I couldn’t make work decisions and I had low motivation, and less creativity and fuzzy forgetful thinking. The lexapro has cleared a lot of that. Heavy exercise really helps too. Demanding classes or weights, something to really work your muscles. However when you are overwhelmed with life it’s so hard to find the time and motivation to do that. I also wanted to comment re your DD’s reading. While a dyslexia diagnosis is helpful, you don’t need to wait for a diagnosis to take action. She needs reading intervention, small group or 1:1. You can ask (beg) your school to see if they can offer anything. But also tutoring by a tutor who uses an evidence based systematic phonics approach is the best thing you can do for a child with dyslexia. Is that something you could afford? Your state based SPELD may be able to list suitable tutors in your area.

Your workload alone would make anyone feel increased anxiety! That’s so much to deal with, you must feel pulled in every direction. I agree with BlinkyBill on SSRIs. My experience is that they made me feel clearer and more resilient, reduced the feeling of overwhelm. I hope your GP can give you some help when you get in.

constant state of anxiety

wannabefree

I’ve suffered from anxiety all my life but over the last couple of months, its off the charts. I hav...