Ok I need to vent.
So, my MIL. She has many medical issues, all of them rare. Some of them will seem like fairly common issues but its always something rare. I always took these at face value but over the years I’ve become more and more skeptical and wonder how many of these are self diagnosed. An example is something that sounds like gluten intolerance but its not gluten, its some weird thing she is allergic to that occurs in wheat and some other things I’ve never narrowed down. And then more and more things are added to what she can’t eat and various conditions, until one day she ends up in hospital and it turns out she has a problem with her stomach that would’ve been picked up much sooner if she didn’t keep coming up with all these weird allergies. And thats just one example.
Anyway, its always something and I don’t doubt she has medical issues but I’m getting more and more suspicious about whether a doctor has diagnosed them or not.
So today, DH has come off the phone to her and he mentioned that its looking like DD1 has dyslexia. She then tells him about some weird eye condition that presents as dyslexia but isn’t and it runs in the family, and lists the people that have this condition. I’ve taken DD1 to one of the top childrens eye clinics in Melbourne, paid an arm and a leg for him, and specifically mentioned that I suspect dyslexia but want her eyes thoroughly checked first, and she comes back with a clean bill of health. DH says no, his mum says that hardly anyone knows about this weird condition, you need to find someone who specifically knows of this condition. I just find it hard to believe that a childrens eye clinic in Melbourne wouldn’t know what this is.
And so now I’m just pissed off. Its impossible to get in to see a developmental psychologist for dyslexia testing atm because of the lockdowns last year, the waiting lists are so long they can’t even give an estimate. And now he wants me to also chase down some eye condition.
Anyway, I told him I’m skeptical its that, but I’ll raise it when we finally get in for dyslexia testing because I’m not taking her back to get her eyes tested, and then he got pissed off that I was doubting the condition exists. Which I’m not. I’m sure its googlable. I just doubt his family has it given his mums history of medical conditions. So then I got upset about the whole thing.
I’m finding it stressful enough trying to get her a diagnosis and work out what to do. I feel like I’ve failed her because I knew there were some issues in 2019 and went into the start of the school year in 2020 talking to her teacher, to get to the bottom of it, and then covid happened and I was in survival mode. I completely forgot all about it because of everything else. Now here we are, she is in grade 3, I can’t get her diagnosed for love or money, my job is ridiculously stressful which just adds to my mental load, and it feels like DH and MIL are just making this harder instead of easier.